Eric Barker's Blog

The problem with emotions is not that we have them, but that they’re allowed to operate unsupervised.

You’d think we’d have figured out by now how to not be held hostage by a rogue’s gallery of feelings that behave like the cast of a badly written soap opera trapped inside your skull. Emotions are like a chaotic group chat and you’re just trying to mute it without accidentally blocking your own capacity for joy.

But here’s the really annoying thing: emotions aren’t just intrusive thoughts pret...

Parenting small children can be a Sisyphean grind, except Sisyphus is half your size, naked, and screaming for you to carry the boulder up the hill for him.

Getting little kids to do even the simplest of things can be near impossible.

You think you’d have the advantage, right? You’re the adult. You’ve got years of experience, a bigger vocabulary, and actual logic. But no. You’re not just battling their stubbornness; you’re dealing with the chaotic energy of someone who finds it hilarious to sc...

Most of us enter the workforce like wide-eyed toddlers clutching a sippy cup of optimism, ready to “make a difference.” Then, one day, we notice that Becky in accounting is suspiciously good at turning other people’s ideas into her own ideas. And Brad in marketing keeps getting promoted even though he hasn’t responded to an email since 2014.

You try to focus on the work, but you realize that “the work” is just the background noise of this whole operatic farce. And then, slowly, the horrible re...

The sheer volume of pseudoscientific drivel available on the subject of “getting in shape” is so dense, it could collapse in on itself and form a black hole of misinformation.

We are living in a hellish fitness funhouse where every corner is lined with smug, glistening torsos barking contradictory advice. It’s like every gym bro and spiritual moon-juice peddler formed a consortium dedicated to ensuring no two people on Earth can agree on the basic act of moving one’s body. The only consensus s...

Travel is wonderful. It promises enlightenment, new experiences, and the smug satisfaction of saying, “Well, when I was in Portugal…”

But traveling these days feels a bit like being punched in the wallet. Modern airlines use a combination of arcane rituals, machine learning, and revenge to set prices. There’s a fee for everything short of blinking. Seat reservation? Extra. Cabin baggage? Extra. Want to sit next to the person you love? Better love them from row 32.

You suddenly realize that you...

We’ve all got that voice in our heads. The internal heckler perched in your skull’s cheap seats, shouting things like “You’re not good enough,” or “Why are you even trying?” (My internal voice sounds like a mix between my fifth-grade gym teacher and one of those scary moms from a reality show about cheerleading.)

This voice narrates our lives like it’s Ken Burns in a documentary about self-doubt. It’s not helpful. But we listen. We always listen. So what’s to be done?

Let’s look in a less-than...

If you’ve never been in a family crisis, congratulations. You are either:

an orphan,lying,due.

And by crisis, I mean full-on, real-deal adversity. Divorce, grief, bankruptcy, etc. The life-wrecking, soul-scraping, “somebody go ahead and unplug me because I cannot” kind of crisis. You’re trying to cobble together some kind of Norman Rockwell-with-an-iPad situation while it feels like the world is burning. Just doing anything you can so your therapist doesn’t write “escalating” in the margin...

Some say negotiation is an art. But often it feels like spiritual erosion.

What should be a simple matter of mutual agreement instead dissolves into a maddeningly performative exchange where no one says what they mean and everyone suspects they’re being cheated. And the worst part? It’s EVERYWHERE:

Asking your boss for a raise? You have to justify it like you’re applying for parole.Negotiating the purchase of an automobile contains more conflict than most UFC matches.Then there’s the domest...

My bestseller Plays Well With Others is now available in paperback!

It’s lighter, cheaper, and comes with all the brutal, hilarious truths of the hardcover edition — just now in a floppier, more affordable format.

Get your copy here.

Let’s face it: hardcovers are the uptight snobs of the book world. They’re thick, heavy, and full of the smug energy of someone who insists you say “croissant” with a French accent. And can we talk about dust jackets? It’s the book equivalent of wearing a toupee.

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We need to connect deeply to have good relationships. To build trust. To reduce conflict. To influence others and help them make positive change.

But to be emotionally understood by someone else — or the reverse — isn’t just uncommon. It’s practically arcane, like alchemy or finding good tomatoes out of season. It’s rarer than a humble influencer. We try, but often we’re like the adults in a Peanuts cartoon. Wah-wah-wah.

What’s truly maddening is that this entire ordeal is treated like somethi...