Sue Julsen's Blog - Posts Tagged "audio"
FROM THE HEART AVAILABLE IN AUDIO
The narrator is Beth MacEwan, and she did an awesome job of bringing life to this very special book that exposes feelings never shared before now.
Follow the link below to listen to a sample of From The Heart:
http://www.audible.com/pd/ref=det_twe...
Visit my website to see all of my books and to find out what's coming out soon:
http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen
FROM THE HEART
From The Heart is a book of fifteen poems, exposing feelings never shared before. It also includes stories behind what inspired each poem in this book to be written.
If you’ve read Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival and the other two books in this series, then you already know my story, and you’ll recognize several poems from that time in my life.
If you haven't read my other books yet, to learn the full story, you’ll just have to read the bitter memories trilogy.
For so many years my life was a living hell on earth, but here's one of the poems in FROM THE HEART written after I'd gone on a three-day retreat. This was when my life began to improve, but I still had a long way to go before I found true peace. Enjoy!
THE BRIDGE TO LIFE
I knew one day I would find a place
A place where all fears would fade away.
I spent my entire life trying to hide
Trying clever ways, I thought, to conceal
Afraid to let anyone see the real me.
I knew one day I would find a place
A place to build a bridge to You.
I was looking for a road or a path
A narrow road to love, to strength
A path to understanding.
I knew one day I would find a place
A place of sparkling waters.
There’s been so much missing in my life
I want to let love enter in
I no longer want to go it alone.
Did I let it just happen?
Or, did someone bring me here?
This place of peace and contentment
The place to build a bridge to You.
Never to go alone again, or, in fear.
I have found the place I looked for
The place to let my feelings free.
A place to let God enter in
With His love, His strength
His understanding.
* * *
I hope you'll get a copy of FROM THE HEART and take a short walk back in time with me. Or, get the audio version; sit back, relax, and listen as Beth MacEwan narrates.
I personally was totally blown away when I first heard Beth bringing life to my simple words, speaking with all the passion I felt during the writing.
The audiobook is truly awesome!
A Reader Said...
"Sue Julsen's books make a very nice Christmas gift! She writes everything from the heart, leaving readers spellbound. Highly recommend." C.W.
I do write from the heart, taking readers on a journey into my life...into my world as a child, abused and terrified, trying to survive...
The crime fiction included in the second and third books of the Bitter Memories trilogy (Trophy Murders and Cutter's Revenge), I delve into my killer's head, and into his heart.
This Christmas give gifts that open another world...give the gift of adventure and learning...Books really do make wonderful gifts!
Check out the bitter memories trilogy, and From The Heart, my book of poetry (also available in audio). All e-books/kindle only $2.99 each!
Head on over to my website to learn more: http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen
NOTE: Due to strong language and content, the trilogy is not suitable for children.
LITTLE GIRL LOST (part 12)
Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival
True Story of a little girl (me) kidnapped by her father...
First off, this is NOT a cozy, feel-good book! It is a 'no holds barred' story about my life dealing with extreme child abuse and my will to survive under the worst conditions.
Bitter Memories is not an easy book to read. Comments from my readers have been numerous, with most saying they felt every emotion possible while reading my story. Most also said they cried, numerous times. Many had to read in short spells because the content was too heartbreaking to take all at once.
However, these wonderful fans, many who are now lifelong friends, continued to read. They continued to learn what it can be like for a child living with abuse.
Bitter Memories was forty plus years in the writing. In the beginning I tried to write it as fiction. I wasn't ready for the world to know what had happened to me all those years.
But, that didn't work.
Next I tried to write it with "clean" language, and that didn't work either. I felt I wasn't being honest. You see, there's no way to "sugarcoat" what I lived through.
Finally, I decided the only way for me to get my message out to the people who needed to hear it the most, was to write my story the way it actually happened.
Let me tell you this: It wasn't any easier for me to write than it's been for people to read. I had to relive all those painful memories! All the things I tried for years to forget but couldn't. Recurring nightmares made sure I didn't forget!
Many times the pain became so strong that I couldn't continue writing. I had to put those memories on a shelf for a while. And, I also had to cry, once again, from all the pain that still lived inside of me.
But I still knew, in order to help others, and myself, Bitter Memories was a story that needed to be told.
I knew by exposing my life and all the bad things that happened, I could help other abused kids, with or without abduction, because those still suffering needed to know they were not alone.
There are others just like me -- many more like me -- and there is hope for kids living with the hidden scars of abuse. There is help for abused kids to heal their pain...to heal their shame.
And, yes! Kids who have been abused feel so much shame. We feel what happened to us was our fault. We feel unloved. We feel we were "bad," not our abusers. And it doesn’t take extreme abuse like mine was to mess up a kid’s head!
As much suffering as I lived with, I was one of the lucky kids. Abducted at age three, living a life of pure hell for six long years, and then to be found in fairly good health…physically, that is. Mentally I was a mess! And I remained a mess for many, many years.
Statistics would say I should have died. And I'm sure I would have, if not for a protective part of the brain.
To be continued…
If you’re ready to read and to learn from my story, please head on over to my website and pick up a copy of Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival. Then go back for the other two books in this trilogy, Trophy Murders and Cutter’s Revenge to learn the rest of the story. Once you read these, why not grab a copy of From The Heart: A Collection of Poems and Stories, also based on my times in my life. Or, get the audio version and listen to From The Heart narrated by Beth MacEwan. Beth is absolutely awesome the way she brings my poetry to life!
http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen
BOOKS BY SUE JULSEN: A TRUE CRIME, MEMOIR, and CRIME FICTION AUTHOR

Drowning In Memories, book two of the Bitter Memories Series continues my story. You'll learn about my amazing brother, and a lot more, written in two parts. Bitter Tasting Memories, part one; After Midnight, part two (dedicated to my big brother), and a bonus short story, One In A Million: A True Story of Friendship.
Some of the dialog has been recreated from memory, and some recreated using known characteristics and actions of the person being quoted, but the events contained are as close to truth as I know them to be. AVAILABLE IN PAPERBACK, E-BOOK, AND COMING SOON TO AUDIO.
After Midnight is part two in "Drowning In Memories," dedicated to my brother. It continues memories and many mistakes I made along the way. This up and down ride includes fun times, not-so-fun-times and sad times that came to mind during and after writing "Bitter Memories." ALSO AVAILABLE IN E-BOOK AS A SINGLE.
One In A Million is a heartwarming true story about a wonderful man who helped change my life while helping me find my way back from a never-ending abyss after my suicide attempt. This is an awesome story of friendship. It is also the bonus story in "Drowning In Memories." ALSO AVAILABLE IN E-BOOK AS A SINGLE.
From The Heart, part of the Bitter Memories Series, is a collection of fifteen poems written from events in my life, including short stories that inspired the writing of each poem. Included is the first poem I wrote at 9 years old after the death of my mother, delving into feelings never shared before this book. AVAILABLE IN E-BOOK AND AUDIO.
Cutter's Revenge is the perfect way to round out my Bitter Memories series — and to get a pound of revenge, safely. This book continues my story after my adoption, mixing truth with fiction. But, anyone who’s read the other two books will know what’s true and what isn't in this story.
While a fictionalized serial killer stalks our little town, I write my story the way it could have been...IF...turning tragedy into a fantastic, exciting read! Cutter’s Revenge, unrelentingly suspenseful, made an excellent end to the Bitter Memories Series, but it is also an excellent second in my new Revenge Series. AVAILABLE IN PAPERBACK AND E-BOOK.
Trophy Murders: A TOWN TERRORIZED...THE FAMILY SECRETS...YEARS OF LIES UNFOLDING...,
the first in my new Revenge Series, is an action-packed fictional crime story, putting a twist on the truth from the Bitter Memories Series. NOTE: Previously book #2 of the Bitter Memories Series written for my fiction fans. AVAILABLE IN PAPERBACK AND E-BOOK.Cutter's Revenge is book #2 in the Revenge Series, as well as book #3 in the Bitter Memories Series).
The Rose: A Tale of Fantasy is a cute story written just for fun. Complete with talking animals, they try to help their "Queen" in her quest when they learn of danger coming to the city and to the forest. AVAILABLE IN E-BOOK AND AUDIO.
Zip Ties and Lies is a true crime of the Anderson/DiMaggio murder case that started in Boulevard, California (San Diego area) and ended in the Idaho wilderness, leaving three people and a dog, dead.
Who REALLY killed the Anderson's? Who's behind the COVER-UP? Was Jim DiMaggio innocent of murder, arson and kidnapping?
As a kidnapped victim/survivor myself, I immediately became interested in the Hannah Anderson “alleged” kidnapping case. I must say, from personal experiences, Hannah Anderson has never acted like a "victim" in any sense of the word.
Hannah Anderson’s mother and little brother were murdered. Brutally murdered!
Hannah’s mother was viciously beaten to death. Her little brother's body was burned so badly in a fire that was set on purpose that very little was left of his body to determine how he actually died. And their loving dog, Cali, also murdered, was at least mercifully shot in the head instead of beaten to death.
Zip Ties and Lies explores the facts as we know them to be, the numerous LIES told by Hannah Anderson, and the apparent COVER-UP by the sheriff's department and possibly the FBI.
Jim DiMaggio, accused and condemned to death by San Diego's sheriff Bill "rush to judgment" Gore, never had the chance to tell his side of the story. Jim DiMaggio could have been an innocent man shot down by what appears to have been a firing squad.
Zip Ties and Lies brings to light a multitude of questions that followers of this case would like answers to. Truthful answers, not more lies! You will also read about who Jimmy Lee really was from family and friends who knew him best.
Then, with all the "facts" in front of you, make up your own mind on who you think REALLY killed Tina and Ethan Anderson, and Cali. AVAILABLE IN PAPERBACK AND E-BOOK.
Sue Julsen is a True Crime, Memoir, and Crime Fiction author. Find all of her books on her website: http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen
FIND IT ALL HERE: A Powerful, Unforgettable Memoir Series, to Exciting Crime Fiction, to a True Crime Murder Case That Explores the "FACTS" of two Brutal Murders in California…

Drowning In Memories, book two of the Bitter Memories Series continues my story. You'll learn about my amazing brother, and a lot more, written in two parts. Bitter Tasting Memories, part one; After Midnight, part two (dedicated to my big brother), and a bonus short story, One In A Million: A True Story of Friendship.
Some of the dialog has been recreated from memory, and some recreated using known characteristics and actions of the person being quoted, but the events contained are as close to truth as I know them to be. AVAILABLE IN PAPERBACK, E-BOOK, AND COMING SOON TO AUDIO.
After Midnight is part two in "Drowning In Memories," dedicated to my brother. It continues memories and many mistakes I made along the way. This up and down ride includes fun times, not-so-fun-times and sad times that came to mind during and after writing "Bitter Memories." ALSO AVAILABLE IN E-BOOK AS A SINGLE.
One In A Million is a heartwarming true story about a wonderful man who helped change my life while helping me find my way back from a never-ending abyss after my suicide attempt. This is an awesome story of friendship. It is also the bonus story in "Drowning In Memories." ALSO AVAILABLE IN E-BOOK AS A SINGLE.
From The Heart, part of the Bitter Memories Series, is a collection of fifteen poems written from events in my life, including short stories that inspired the writing of each poem. Included is the first poem I wrote at 9 years old after the death of my mother, delving into feelings never shared before this book. AVAILABLE IN E-BOOK AND AUDIO.
Cutter's Revenge is the perfect way to round out my Bitter Memories series — and to get a pound of revenge, safely. This book continues my story after my adoption, mixing truth with fiction. But, anyone who’s read the other two books will know what’s true and what isn't in this story.
While a fictionalized serial killer stalks our little town, I write my story the way it could have been...IF...turning tragedy into a fantastic, exciting read! Cutter’s Revenge, unrelentingly suspenseful, made an excellent end to the Bitter Memories Series, but it is also an excellent second in my new Revenge Series. AVAILABLE IN PAPERBACK AND E-BOOK.
Trophy Murders: A TOWN TERRORIZED...THE FAMILY SECRETS...YEARS OF LIES UNFOLDING...,
the first in my new Revenge Series, is an action-packed fictional crime story, putting a twist on the truth from the Bitter Memories Series. NOTE: Previously book #2 of the Bitter Memories Series written for my fiction fans. AVAILABLE IN PAPERBACK AND E-BOOK.Cutter's Revenge is book #2 in the Revenge Series, as well as book #3 in the Bitter Memories Series).
The Rose: A Tale of Fantasy is a cute story written just for fun. Complete with talking animals, they try to help their "Queen" in her quest when they learn of danger coming to the city and to the forest. AVAILABLE IN E-BOOK AND AUDIO.
Zip Ties and Lies is a true crime of the Anderson/DiMaggio murder case that started in Boulevard, California (San Diego area) and ended in the Idaho wilderness, leaving three people and a dog, dead.
Who REALLY killed the Anderson's? Who's behind the COVER-UP? Was Jim DiMaggio innocent of murder, arson and kidnapping?
As a kidnapped victim/survivor myself, I immediately became interested in the Hannah Anderson “alleged” kidnapping case. I must say, from personal experiences, Hannah Anderson has never acted like a "victim" in any sense of the word.
Hannah Anderson’s mother and little brother were murdered. Brutally murdered!
Hannah’s mother was viciously beaten to death. Her little brother's body was burned so badly in a fire that was set on purpose that very little was left of his body to determine how he actually died. And their loving dog, Cali, also murdered, was at least mercifully shot in the head instead of beaten to death.
Zip Ties and Lies explores the facts as we know them to be, the numerous LIES told by Hannah Anderson, and the apparent COVER-UP by the sheriff's department and possibly the FBI.
Jim DiMaggio, accused and condemned to death by San Diego's sheriff Bill "rush to judgment" Gore, never had the chance to tell his side of the story. Jim DiMaggio could have been an innocent man shot down by what appears to have been a firing squad.
Zip Ties and Lies brings to light a multitude of questions that followers of this case would like answers to. Truthful answers, not more lies! You will also read about who Jimmy Lee really was from family and friends who knew him best.
Then, with all the "facts" in front of you, make up your own mind on who you think REALLY killed Tina and Ethan Anderson, and Cali. AVAILABLE IN PAPERBACK AND E-BOOK.
Sue Julsen is a True Crime, Memoir, and Crime Fiction author. Find all of her books on her website: http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen
NOT ALL MEMORIES ARE BAD
Bitter Memories, a true story of survival while coping and learning to overcome severe childhood abuse is a heartfelt human interest story that should be read and shared.
This insightful journey into my childhood of tragedy and sorrow around every corner will take you on a roller coaster ride you will not soon forget.
If you or someone you know has suffered physical, emotional or mental abuse, rape and/or sexual molestation in silence, or if you'd just like to learn more about child abuse and the effects on the child, my Bitter Memories series is for you.
With help from my other personalities, and years of nightmares, the dialogue is honest and intense as I show the countless attacks and endless horrific events inflicted on me, an innocent child.
Drowning In Memories, book 2 of the series, is written in two parts: Bitter Tasting Memories, part one; After Midnight, part two, dedicated to my brother, plus a bonus short story, One In A Million: A True Story of Friendship.
Parts one and two continues my memories, including the many mistakes I made along the way. This up and down ride has fun times, not-so-fun times, and sad times that came to mind during and after writing Bitter Memories.
Many secrets my uncle kept hidden over the years are revealed. While trying to mend fences with my aunt I learned you never can go home again, at least I never could. John, who I didn't know growing up, was an amazing big brother. With great pride I share some of our times together while we were getting to know each other.
One In A Million, the bonus story, is about true friendship and love between two friends helping each other deal with spirals of emotions, good and bad.
To learn more, and to see all the books in the series, plus my other books, please visit my website.
THE POWER OF THE MIND IS AMAZING
The scars from childhood abuse runs so deep, even after years of therapy, we can’t fully shake what happened to us. We aren’t feeling sorry for ourselves when this happens. It’s just part of our lives; it’s what we have to deal with time and time again.
Something as simple as an innocent phrase uttered by a friend, or overhearing something someone on the street says, can trigger these memories. Even a tone of voice can bring back times when abuse occurred.
There’s no way to escape the power of the mind as it continues to hang onto memories — good and bad. As a survivor of child abuse, we have to learn how to deal with these memories whenever they decide to raise their ugly heads. We have to learn how to not strike out at others for something they say or do to bring back that horrible time for us. But it’s not easy. The first instinct when hurt is to strike back. It’s built in survival.
But, as children we couldn’t strike back.
As children, we had to endure whatever came our way, whether it was verbal, physical, or sexual abuse. To fight back would only make the abuse more painful. Verbal abuse could so easily turn physical, while physical and sexual abuse could turn so violent that we might not live through it.
Maybe you think those suffering from abuse might be better off to actually die. Well, as a child, many of us did pray night after night to not wake up the next day. We hurt, not only physically, but mentally. At the time of the abuse, for some, we believed dying would have been a blessing, but somewhere deep inside of us was the will to live. There was always the hope that life would get better. There was always the hope that someone would rescue us from our tormentor.
Unfortunately, many children who are abused do die. They don’t get the chance to be rescued, or to learn there is life after abuse. They never get to experience a life other than being hurt, many brutally beaten to death.
My heart goes out to all these children who never had a chance. My heart goes out to all the children who have lived a life of abuse and were lucky to survive, because I know their suffering. My heart goes out to all the adult survivors of abuse; especially the ones who have not yet learned how to love; how to trust another person.
But, it’s not easy for us to love or to trust. Many times our abuse came from a family member or close friends of the family. They were people who claimed to love us, then turned on us and hurt us. As adult survivors, we remember those empty words. We remember wanting to believe, wanting love. We wanted to know the nurturing of a mother and father. We wanted a healthy relationship with uncles and aunts, and friends. But we were cheated out of a “normal” life. We lived knowing pain and suffering and fear.
It’s no surprise survivors of abuse find it hard to love and trust another person. When we do try to love, to give a person the chance to love us, we’re always waiting for that hand to fall, for hurtful words to be screamed, for that pain we’d always lived with to return.
It takes a strong man or woman to deal with our pain. For the person who will take the time to know us, to love us, to understand what life was like for us, and to learn that we are not damaged goods, he or she will be greatly rewarded. We are human beings wanting love. We want to forget the past and to trust. It takes a very strong partner or friend to stick by us, giving us strength and hope, and unconditional love. But, one thing about abuse survivors is this: when we do finally find that one person we can love and trust, as long as we are not betrayed, he or she will have our love, our heart and our soul.
As children from a background of abuse, we lived through unspeakable things. We lived through a life that many times would have been so much easier to just give up and die. But to survive we had to have the will to live. We were fighters, but not in the traditional sense of the word. We were inward fighters, refusing to give up, refusing to lie down and die.
We were innocent children, living in a cruel and hurtful world, unable to stand up to those big monsters towering over us. Many times we were threatened if we didn’t obey the monsters wishes. We didn’t deserve the life we lived. We did nothing to be treated as we were, to be threatened or, in our minds, punished.
We were innocent victims, then. But as adults, we are not victims any longer. We ARE survivors!
My own personal story of kidnapping and abuse is told in Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival. I lived with years of abuse. Most of my abuse was extreme, but my feelings and my pain were no different from any child who has lived with abuse. In the sequel, Drowning In Memories, I continue my story, living past the abuse, when all memories were not bad.
Bitter Memories is not easy to read. It is not sugarcoated to make it better than it was, or described any worse than it was. I did not clean up the language heard on a daily basis. I did change the names and locale to protect the innocent — and even the guilty.
I told my story, exactly as I remember it, to help other survivors still suffering to find their path toward healing, but also to help people who do not know about the effects of child abuse to understand what that kind of life is like for a child.
I wanted society to learn from my experiences so they would not sit back and do absolutely nothing to help a child being abused. I also hoped society would learn and accept and help all of us who come forward to tell our own stories, instead of condemning us for a life we had no control over. As survivors of child abuse, extreme or not, we have suffered enough.
From emails and letters I receive daily from readers, my hopes and prayers are being answered. These letters and emails let me know I did not put myself out there for nothing. Thank you so much for reading my story, learning from it, and for telling others so they too can learn and understand.
Of course there will always be people who don’t care to understand, who continue to say hurtful things. For these people I ask this: If a child or an adult survivor comes to you, please be kind. Try to listen and try to understand. Please don’t ridicule or condemn. You could be the saving light for this survivor.
For the ones who were (and are) still suffering, a very special thank you goes out to all who have contacted me after reading my story. You took the first step in leaving your past behind. I’m so proud of all of you! After living in painful silence for so many years, you now know you are not alone. You are survivors, moving forward, ready to live a happier, peaceful life. The steps toward healing will not be easy, but remember this: The road to success is always under construction, but the repairs to get to the end of that road are so worth the effort. No matter what gets in your path, just don’t ever quit. You are worth it!
Discover all my books in the Bitter Memories Series, the Revenge Series, and more on my website. You will not want to miss reading Cutter’s Revenge, the last in the bitter memories series, where I get tons of “safe and purely fictional revenge” toward some who hurt me as a child.
For my fiction readers, Trophy Murders, based on the true story, will be right up your alley. It also sets the stage for Cutter’s story. Enjoy!
True Crime, Memoir and Crime Fiction Author Sue Julsen, Shares a Little Bit About Herself and Her Writing
I started to school for the first time in the fourth grade. This was the grade I was supposed to be in based on my age. It was a trial run, being told if I couldn't catch up with the other kids, I would be put back...all the way back to first grade.
That would have been devastating! Luckily, I was a fast learner, and I managed to catch up. I got to stay in the fourth grade, barely passing. But I did pass, and continued on to the next grade, then the next, and the next.
With determination I made it all the way through the twelfth grade, never admitting that I hated school with a passion.
It was many years later before I enrolled in college, but this time it was because I wanted to, not because I "had" to.
Soon I found out I loved college! I never liked math of any kind, even in college, but since I had to take algebra to graduate, I saved it until my last semester. Again I drew on my determination to pass, even if it was squeaking by. Somehow, I managed to graduate with a B in algebra, and straight A's in everything else.
And I did all this while working grave shift, full time, for a newspaper. I never had time, or the energy, to run the party scene. I was busy studying or working. Boy, was I glad when graduation day came. I wanted to catch up on my sleep!
However, I did prove to myself, and others, if you want something bad enough, you can do it, and nothing can stop you.
Now with my college degree behind me, (I majored in Journalism; minored in English) I knew it was time to get back to work on a book I'd been trying to write for so many years.
Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival was that book.
It was forty years in the making, and another three years tossing around whether to publish or not. I decided to move forward and publish it, because it is a story that needed to be told. It is a story to help others who had lived a life as I had growing up.
There have been eight more books since that one, and I have more to come as time allows over the next few years.
Writing is in my blood. If I couldn't write, I'm not sure I'd be very happy. I live to write, and I also write to live.
I must admit, after the childhood I grew up with, the life I told in Bitter Memories, today I live a wonderfully happy life, showing that there really is happiness after child abuse.
Bitter Memories is not an easy book to read, but it was my life as I remember it. Drowning In Memories, the sequel, shows that all memories are not bad. Cutter's Revenge and Trophy Murders show I do know how to have "fun" writing to keep readers on the edge of the chair, while Zip Ties and Lies shows the other side of my writing — True Crime.
Please go to my website and check out all my books.
INTERVIEW WITH FIONA MCVIE
This is a small part of the interview by Fiona.
Name: Sue Julsen
Fiona: Where are you from: Texas
Fiona: A little about your self `ie your education Family life etc
A few years after graduating high school, ready to leave Texas, I packed up and moved to Washington State. Five years later I moved to California. Several years later, still in California, I met the love of my life. After 23 years he’s still the love of my life and he’s also my best friend. We enjoy our time together, which has been pretty much 24/7 all these years. We have two rescue dogs and a bird.
Eight years ago, ready to retire from “real” work, we packed up and moved to Nevada. Even though cold and snow aren't my favorites, I really love living here, and I’m finally getting to live my dream as a writer.
Fiona: Tell us your latest news?
I don’t have an official title for my next book yet, but it will be #3 in the Revenge Series, spinning off Trophy Murders and Cutter’s Revenge.
Here’s a sneak peek, Fiona, just for your readers: ...
To read more of this interview, follow this link: http://wp.me/p3uv2y-2bE
Follow this link to my website where you can learn more about all of my books currently available:
http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen